Okay guys so I am going to get super real with you guys. Confidence and I have a tricky relationship. I have moments where I feel like I am on cloud 9 and I feel like I am doing really well and feeling confident as ever. Then other times I feel like I am in a deeper hole where I can't find a way to get out.... Okay thats a dramatic way to put it but basically I feel sometimes like I am empty of the confidence that was there at times.
I have had many opportunities and support to make me a confident person, but there is something that inside of me that keeps fighting it away.
Tonight I was at dance and we were going over technique in the Jazz class I am in. I would like to say that I believe I was having confidence flowing through me but it wouldn't be exactly true. I for sure feel more confident when I am dancing hip hop or close to that but when it comes to the things I am not use to like in tonights case Jazz or ballet type stuff, I feel less confident. Through the years I have tried to perfect a look that would show others that I was 100% confident and even happy with what I am doing. But it becomes faded sometimes. My dance teacher Carissa really helped me tonight just by her simple words that she said. She told me that she wants me to be confident and see that I am good because I am. I am very much a word person. I love quotes, sayings and just anything that is inspiring using words. So when Carissa told me that, it changed me. Maybe not to where I will be confident all the time, but it is going to help me see myself in a better light. It will make me try to view myself in a more positive and confident way so that I am not always down grading myself to where I get into that darker place. So if you are reading this Carissa, thank you so much. Your words mean more than you think. :)
So now lets talk about the people that are feeling kind of the same as me. Confidence is a wonderful thing. It makes us feel good and it makes us see ourselves better. But even though its this wonderful thing that we want, it is probably one of the hardest things for us to find and keep. We all want to be able to be good at something, and when we find it its a wonderful feeling, but sometimes we loose our way and start to loose why we began that in the first way.
I want us all to be able to not go on that path. I want this year for more people, myself included, to look at ourselves as a beautiful human being. Someone that deserves to go after what we want and to feel good about it. If you want something, don't just give up because you think you are bad. You never know what will happen until you try. We all can get that confidence that we deserve and we can find a way to keep it.
I am so thankful for everyone that is in my life. I am filled with joy to have so many people around me that want the best for me. When I was younger, if you tried to tell me that this is what my life would be like I would not believe you in any way. God works in crazy ways and I am so thankful for all he has done for me. I have everyone in Elluminate that makes me so happy to see and be around. I have my new dance group at the studio I go to and I can't even believe that I get to hang out with such amazingly talented people who are also the most kind hearted. I have a wonderful family that stays by my side throughout the times where I didn't even know I needed them. I have the best friends in the world that make life so much more fulfilling. Gosh life is great and I am excited to work on my confidence and to make life even better.
Thanks for reading!
I have a lot of blog posts planned coming up! I have been getting so many ideas of posts that will impact people in many different ways and I am so excited to get them going! This one just felt like tonight would be the best time to do it! I hope you enjoyed this and I hope it inspired you to get you on the path to confidence and a better life.
Until next time,
XOXO,
Gossip Girl
AKA.... M'lyn
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